Cosmic Gardener – Cultivating a Life

Forty years ago I was asked for  one key piece of advice about how to positively manage life. At the time I was working in healthcare, and the person asking was in the last days of a three week intensive rehab program. It was a question they were asking most of us that had worked closely with them. They were compiling a notebook of key takeaways from their transformative experiences at the center.

It was an intimidating question. How could I distill one bit of wisdom (if there had been any) from the hours we had spent in conversation?

After brief reflection (they were in a hurry) I blurted, Seek Balance. Whereupon they immediately responded, “And I’m the only one that can know what that is for me.” With that comeback I had no doubt that as they faced the life challenges that would surely follow, they would remember (and use) the tools hard won through their hard work.   

Recently I had the opportunity to offer similar input during a chance encounter in a retail setting. It was early morning and the self-checkout area was deserted except for the store employee who was happy to engage with me.

The associate was gifted in customer service and conversation, and I asked if they liked the work. “It pays the bills.” A bit stunned at their candor, I inquired as to their previous employment. The current work was clearly a positive alternative.

By now we were facing each other. Seeing no joy in their eyes I risked asking, “What are you going to do with the rest of your life?,’ which resulted in a shrug and “Whatever shows up.”

Looking them straight in the eye I said, ‘Whatever unfolds have fun. And be kind.’ We shook hands and I left with my purchase, them with a conundrum.

That encounter spurred the memory of the one a generation earlier. Together it occurred to me that the takeaways from the two offer a simple foundation for a life well lived.

Seek Balance. Have Fun. Be Kind. Life is not a spectator sport.